I'm Goin To Talk About Some Motherfucking Freaky Shit Now

So i just made me some muscle rub and i'm about to rub me one. Life don't get any better than this? I sure hope the fuck so. Otherwise, I don't have anything to look forward to. I know life is going to get better than this 'cause tommorrow i'm goin to rub me another one.

I'm in Walmart tonite. Yep, I shop walmart. I'm poor. Walmart is always good for a laugh. Talk about some motherfucking freaky shit, now. I can't believe how fucked up things can get when a sperm meets an egg. Every turn down every aisle there's goin to be a motherfucking intercourse mistake. This one aisle had these two dudes shopping who looked like they had just come in from the back 40 after a week of chasing farm animals. Motherfucking redneck looking. A grocery cart full of doritos, jerky and gatorade. What the fuck?

The best one tonite was when I was waiting to get my groceries checked out. This lady was loony. Throwing her groceries around and reading all the labels out loud. Holy crap I couldn't stop laughing. I usually hate waiting in the check out line but this was really entertaining.

So is something freaky going to motherfucking happen tommorrow. You bet. I'll be looking for it and forward to it.

MOTHER.